Urban Legends

Call Girl Barbie

The Legend

Did you know that Mattel, long ago a reputable manufacturer of children's toys, is now trying to teach our daughters that it's okay to be a prostitute? They are!

This should really be no surprise. Remember a few years ago when Mattel made a Barbie doll that talked, and it said things like, "Math is hard" and "It's fun in the kitchen" and "Tight sweaters make you popular"? This is just more of the same.

Mattel has a whole series that they call "Call Girl Barbie." It's a Barbie doll dressed up as a slut with a cell phone, and she comes in a wide variety of ethnic types -- to be politically correct!

So if you have a decent bone in your body, go out and protest any stores carrying these things. Get them off the shelves so our daughters can't see them and get corrupted. If you have to, buy them and then burn the hell out of them!

Behind the Legend

Call Girl Barbie doll from Mattell(TM)Although technically true, the above legend is a little misleading. And in any case, the problem has been solved. Sort of.

In 2005, Mattel introduced a series of Barbie™ dolls representing a wide variety of professions. There were waitresses, receptionists, flight attendants, nurses, housewives, grade-school teachers, professional models, actresses, and, yes, "call girls." The idea was to help dilute the mildly sexist reputation that had somehow become attached to the Barbie™ line over the years by pointing out that being female doesn't mean that you have to limit your options.

Unfortunately, some women's rights groups (such as NOW, the Nation's Outraged Wives) managed to miss the point and launched a nation-wide protest. Worried about bad press but unwilling to destroy so much product, Mattel relabeled the most offensive dolls -- the Call Girl Barbies™ -- as "Cali Girl Barbies™" with a message that they were from California. Apparently, since the prostitute stereotype and the California teenager stereotype have so much in common in the wardrobe department, this was enough to quiet the protest.

All information on this site is, to the best of our knowledge, false.
If any significant true information has slipped through, we apologize.
Contents © 2005–2012 so don't go spreading our lies without permission.